Getting Back Your Groove
For those of you living in the South, you have undoubtedly been back into the swing of things for a few weeks now. You’re already back in the groove whether you like it or not! For us Northeasterners, though, we still have a few more days of unhurried bliss. My kids start school mid-week, and ease back into it with half-days.
We’ve spent the last couple weeks thinking about and planning our groove for the New Year. And that process always reinforces the definiteness with which kids define the New Year. To them it is absolutely “The First Day of School.” No dropping of the ball and staying up past midnight watching Dick Clark. No…it’s early to bed, with new clothing and freshly-smelling shoes laid out, backpacks organized by the front door, and lunchboxes or lunch-money tucked safely inside a zipped-pocket. It’s calling all of their friends to see which homeroom they’re in, checking bus schedules, and comparing teams.
In trying to get back our groove, I am trying to put myself into my kids’ heads. I find myself consciously disengaging from the mindset of planning my New Year (writing down goals, hosting some parties, and celebrating with friends) and trying to put myself into their shoes by remembering what it was like each and every year of my own childhood on that “First Day of School”…or the official start of their New Year.
So it’s with renewed enthusiasm that I have been driving my daughter to the mallagain and againsearching for just the right tops to go with those perfect new jeans; to the sporting goods store for sturdy sneakersand cleats, pads, and cupsfor my boys; to Target for new lunchboxes; and to furniture stores in surrounding towns for a new sofa for our newly finished basement “dugout.” It’s with the hops of creating happy memories that I drive my kids to their friends’ homes to hang-out “just one last time before school starts”…or to let them enjoy “just one last sleepover, Mom, pleeeease!” (And I have to admit that my daughter and her two friends who spent last night here were too adorableclothed in bikinis, all three of them, in a bubble bath, with my volcanic mud from Costa Rica spread all over their faces and shaving cream squirted all over their legs…..tonight my son is camping out with a friend in a backyard tent)….
In trying to get back our groove, we have become convicted to get our act together: to get all of the kids prepared physically for school with new clothing and new school supplieswhich means first cleaning out their closets; organizing bags for our local thrift shop, consignment shop, and friends whose kids might enjoy our hand-me-downs; and taking those energy-draining excursions to the mall. (If truth be told, the mall has taken on a whole new meaning with a soon-to-be-teen girl. Clothing shopping with her is exhausting, to be sure, but honestly, some of these new girl clothes are so cute that I’m actually getting “into it.” And shopping for the best bargains has not only excavated my hunting instincts; my dusty MBA is actually being put to use here. The teen-girl-clothing-paradigm is as complicated as any I’ve seen: “Mom, I have two skirts on hold at Abercrombie and I saw four new tops at delia’s but one top needs a different color jean and you hate Abercrombie so what am I supposed to do because I really need some cute skirts to go with these tops I like?”)
In trying to get our act together as a family, I have been on a warpath about finishing and organizing our basement so that we gain some square footage for a teen “dugout.” So we’ve put our oldest boys to work, sanding, painting, and hauling. We’ve de-junked, re-grouped, and reinvented that space so that it will serve as our kids’ friends new hangout spot. Or hopefully anyway. (After last weekend’s harrowing experience, we are determined to keep our kids closer to home!) We gave up on any dreams of creating beauty down there (no light, no windows, no doors) and opted instead for space where form meets function. The “teen toys” arrive this week so that by the “New Year” our kids can get back into the groovementally and physicallyknowing that their new space is clean, organized, and filled with things to help them entertain themselves when they feel the need for some down-time.
So in getting back your own groove:
• Shape Up: whip all those closets and kids’ rooms into tip-top shape so that your kids can start their New Year on a clean, fresh note, without the distractions that a chaotic environment inevitably brings. Organize closets, chests of drawers, toy shelves, videos, DVD’s, and CD’s.
• Freshen Up: spray sheets with a new linen spray (treat yourself to something that rings “Fall”), wash windows, vacuum your van, and plump up your pillows.
• Lighten Up: get rid of junk and clutter. Donate it to charity or give it away to a friend who could put it to better use.
• Dress Up: let your kids have some fun picking out a few new things for their school wardrobe. The rite of the New Year certainly includes new shoes and some fun new clothes.
• Ease Up: allow the kids to plan some fun into their everyday reality, as they mentally engage into all that hard work they are about to endure in this New Year.
Happy First Days!
Carolina Fernandez earned an M.B.A. and worked at IBM and as a stockbroker at Merrill Lynch before coming home to work as a wife and mother of four. She totally re-invented herself along the way. Strong convictions were born about the role of the arts in child development; ten years of homeschooling and raising four kids provide fertile soil for devising creative parenting strategies. These are played out in ROCKET MOM! 7 Strategies To Blast You Into Brilliance. It is widely available online, in bookstores or through 888-476-2493. She writes extensively for a variety of parenting resources and teaches other moms via seminars, workshops, keynotes and monthly meetings of the ROCKET MOM SOCIETY, a sisterhood group she launched to “encourage, equip and empower moms for excellence.” Please visit http://www.rocketmom.com.
